Thursday, July 01, 2010

Ahem. Sorry about my lack of blogging.

Well. I've been a little busy with three kiddos. So with no further ado, I'll jump back in! No pictures- for some reason I'm having trouble uploading everything right now. Still working on that. So we'll get into today's feature...

Why parents love to embarrass their teenagers

Otherwise known as "Payback."

Oh yes, my kids can embarrass me. Big time. Rose is part monkey, and she will climb all over everything. And Lacy has no concept of personal space and thinks everyone is her BFF.

So why would today, my major errand running day, be any different?

Oh, we have the usual run off and have lengthy conversations with adults. Which other people (I think) find charming. Me? Well, it was charming the first 500 times it happened.

But perhaps today's embarrassment wasn't so much my children's fault, but rather a byproduct of having children with me. I totally brought it upon myself. But it was Their Fault.

Today was a busy day. Starting off early with a 7:30 wake-up time (why do they never wake up that early during the school year?) and immediately starting to fight. I serve breakfast and work on some morning chores, wash a load of diapers, get the baby down for a nap (I have to say, he is the least embarrassing of my children, despite the fact that he frequently burps and farts loudly in public)... you know, the usual mom stuff. The kids get to watch a television show while I fold socks. At 10 am, we load up in the car and go off to story time at the library. Thank heaven for story time on a beautifully rainy July morning! After story time was over, the real errands began. Bank, and stop by two establishments to give them all of the money I just deposited. Finally, a bite to eat and grocery shopping.

At the grocery store, Rose always insists upon riding in the car shopping cart. You know- the kind that look like this:


Oh yes. Great fun. Unfortunately, Rose is at the age where she no longer wishes to be restrained, and it's difficult for me to keep her restrained even if I wanted to (which is hard because I keep little Ri on my front in a woven wrap, making it difficult to bend and reach in to buckle her in in the first place). So she climbs on it the whole time we're shopping. Eventually she and Lacy start sitting on the edge of the seat with their bottoms in the car and their legs and bodies outside of it. It's already awkwardly shaped and gigantous. Now it's even wider.

Halfway through our shopping trip Rose announces, "I have to go potty!" Well, I kinda had to go too, so it must be time for a bathroom break. I hate hate hate taking bathroom breaks in the middle of a shopping trip. But even more so I hate having accidents in the middle of a shopping trip! So, I park the cart near the bathrooms and we go. After Lacy wastes a bunch of paper in the automatic paper towel dispensers, we finally get back into the cart.

Look back up at the picture of the cart. You'll notice the very front of the cart jets out several inches. And that's your cart's blind spot. I always think I have more clearance than I actually do because the cart is so long. Of course today I happen to park the cart right next to a sunscreen display. Which was soon displayed all over the floor of the store. Right as a bunch of people happened to walk by. I apologized profusely and walked away as quickly as I could, a little pink in the cheeks. We hurry and get the rest of our items and go to check out.

Lacy absolutely loves workers at our local grocery store. She in particular talks to a lady named Crystal and a lady named Rose who works in produce. Today she say Crystal and had to say hello. I told the cashier, laughing, "Yes, that's my girl- wants to work at Top Foods when she's bigger. My girl reaches for the stars, she does." Um, I was talking to an older lady who probably had been working at a grocery store for most of her adult career. Cheeks are slightly pink once again. I try to pry the foot from my mouth and backpedal a little because I'm afraid I was insulting, and quickly we rush out of there (after we look to see if Rose the produce lady is working yet).

And that's when it hit me. While the embarrassment was because of my own doing, it was all because I have children in the first place that I became embarrassed. IT'S ALL THEIR FAULT! And now I understand. I hereby vow to be as embarrassing to my children as humanly possible as soon as they become humiliated by their parents. It's only fair.

5 comments:

Thom & Jenn Tobin said...

Ha Ha! Yes, I have had many "foot in mouth" experiences. The joys! My daughter, Makayla, also reaches for the stars. Her HUGE dream in life us to work at Dairy Queen. She writes about it in school and tells everyone' "when I grow up...." crazy girl! Oh well, I will support her and all my kids in whatever they choose to do.

LMS said...

Yes, absolutey and when it's your chance do, do, do take advantage of it!

Dale Abersold said...

I did my very best to embarrass you, but it didn't seem to work. I keep trying.

Les said...

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

I love it.

And I love embarrassing my teenagers. It's a beautiful thing.

Jeff and Jessie said...

HAHA! That reminds me of one trip when Nelson dropped 3, yes 3, GLASS jars of spaghetti sauce on the floor and they shattered everywhere...sigh
I am anticipating the future...